Advice

Yesterday at our church's small group class, a interesting question was asked. What advice would you give to the soon-to-be married or the newly married?

I was amazed at the response. They didn't feel that it was good idea to tell the truth. Marriage is hard and is filled with a lot of hard work. (I struggle with this attitude - topic for another time. Lying to the next generation maybe why we have a generation gap!)

Here is the advice I wished I had received. Stop judging everything your spouse does by your family's "we've always done things this way." Just because we've done it this way doesn't make it the only way for something to be done right.

Here is an example from very early in my marriage. Where does mustard go when it's put away? His mother put it in the cabinet. My mother always refrigerated ours. Who was right?

This could be a big conflict. Could you image the fights over the condiment of mustard? Unfortunately, it is things like this that are the beginning of a lot of martial troubles. No, not mustard but little petty things.

The label on the mustard bottle does not claim that it needs refrigeration. We put the mustard on the cabinet shelf. Then I had to confess that I prefer my mustard cold. Luckily, he didn't have a preference. Now, you will find the mustard in our refrigerator.  

It seems like a little thing but communication is really the key. We need to express our wants, needs, and preferences but we need to listen to their wants, needs, and preferences and that's when compromise is necessary. Beware the need to control everything around us. It will make us miserable.

Blessings,

Leann Holland

Ghostly Footprints

This morning as I was getting dressed I flashed back to a special moment with a special lady in my past. My Aunt Sandy, who passed away way too young, wore a sweatshirt her young teenage son had outgrown. As a teen, I didn't find the style particularly flattering.

Standing in front of my full length closet mirror, I donned my favorite jeans and my teenage son's hand-me-down black and yellow Batman logo sweatshirt. I just had to laugh. I wondered what my aunt would say. I wish I could call her up and ask her opinion. I hoped the style was a more flattering style for me. Vanity and ghostly footprints. 

Summer's Finally Over

Here in the Tennessee, this summer was hot. Last week to this week our average high temps took a twenty degree drop, in this case it was wonderful. We went from average of 92 degrees to the mid 70's, which is beautiful considering we had 82 days at 90 or above this summer.

What I have loved most about this change in the weather has been hearing the neighborhood children outside playing. After dark last night, they played tag. I have great memories of playing these kinds of childhood games with my sister and cousins.

Take time and let the kid inside you enjoy this season.

Leann Holland

P.S. Still waiting for fall colors, I'll keep you posted.